Happiness Is Just Next To You

I don't have a problem with Chinese people. I really don't. I'm not a racist person, so get that idea out of your head before I even begin. I have no problem with the people of China. I just think that if they are going to run a business in the United States, some ground rules should be put into place.
And let me just state right now that I love Chinese food. It's one of my favorite kinds of food. There's nothing better than a hot, steaming plate of flied lice...er...fried rice. I think my favorite part of fried rice is the scrambled egg in it. Wow--who ever thought of putting pieces of scrambled egg in rice? Best idea ever. My favorite Chinese meal is sweet and sour chicken and fried rice.
Now let me just say quickly (since this is a big part of some people's problems with Chinese food) that food refrigeration, storage, etc, is handled slightly different among Chinese restaurants than other US restaurants. I've heard many stories of non-refrigerated trucks transporting meat to Chinese restaurants, blood-soaked meat sitting directly over fresh vegetables in Chinese refrigerators, and the stories go on. Not to mention the use of cat and squirrel meat in place of chicken. If I have ever eaten sweet and sour cat, I don't want to know about it.
But those things aren't even what disturb me the most. To me, it's the little knowledge of our language that's the most frustrating. Let me give an example using my last experience at my new favorite Chinese joint, China City.
I don't think any of the employees at China City can speak decent English. I went there a couple days ago to pick up lunch for my wife and me. What I wanted was two of their $4.95 lunch specials. Meat, fried rice, and a free drink included! We usually get sweet and sour chicken for me and szechuan chicken for my wife. I walked out of there with, not two lunch specials, but two combos, four egg rolls, and two drinks, which were not free. I don't know what happened, but I know there was a lot of talking, most of which did not involve me and was not understandable, and I somehow left this strange cross-cultural experience with $17 less in my wallet.
Anyways, I took the food home, we ate, and everything was delicious. Another thing I'll never understand, though, are the fortunes found in those usually-tasteless fortune cookies. The grammar on these fortunes is sometimes atrocious. The fortunes are usually pretty general to fit any person's life. For instance, mine said "Look no further, happiness is just next to you." Which would have made more sense if it had said happiness is right next to you. But I've had ones that said "You like Chinese food," which really wouldn't be too much of a stretch no matter who it went to. "Something good will happen soon," is a great one. But my wife received an interesting fortune with our meal that day. It went like this:
"Being an able man. there are always."
This says it all. These two run-on sentences are a look into the everyday business of a Chinese restaurant. No one really knows what the heck they're talking about, and most likely, no one's going to try to figure it out. So give them your $17, take the food you didn't mean to order, and just walk away.

Sorry, We're Closed

Today's the big day! The day my wife and I have been waiting on for three and a half years! We are closing on a new house! Well, a slightly used house. Okay, it was built before the Great Depression. But that's okay, it's a real house! Not even a manufactured one! That's right, my family is finally moving into a real, solid, sturdy, stick-built house. And let me tell you, this has been a long time coming. I would like to take this time to give a brief history of my small family's living experiences since my wife and I were married.
My wife and I got married while we were still in college. Because of this, we had to live in a 400 square foot closet my school chose to call married housing. Our bed was in between the toilet and the refrigerator. Which I guess made it kind of nice--I could roll one way and relieve myself, roll the other way and grab a sandwich. So we were there for about eight months.
After graduating, we really had nowhere to go. We had no jobs, no apartment anymore (our lease was up), and only a thousand dollars or so left over from our wedding. So our only option, then, was to move back to my wife's hometown and live with her parents. We figured we would stay with them for a month or so until we got back on our feet.
Eight months later, when I finally realized it was too late to get a teaching job, we moved into an apartment in the same town. It was a nice one--more than twice as big as our prior married housing space and in a nice area! We even had an extra bedroom to store all the dinosaur figurines my wife collects. Okay, the figurines I collect. So during this time, my wife was pretty much supporting us and paying rent while I substitute taught, like a loser.
Six months later I had a great lead on a job in my hometown. Selling manufactured homes. Hey, I know I wasn't using my degree, but don't you need a good head on your shoulders to sell manufactured homes? Yeah, I thought so, too. While we were there, we found an apartment that wasn't quite as nice as our last. We lost a bedroom. But, hey, we were happy. We still had a dishwasher.
Two or so months later, my wife decided it smelled too much of smoke from the prior renter and we had to move to another apartment in the same complex. Try as I could, I never smelled a thing (Ha ha...I love you, honey!). I have to say, though, it was a lot nicer than our last one. The light fixtures were slightly newer. If you're counting, this would be our fifth move in two years.
Around eight months later (see a pattern here?), after realizing I was probably never going to make it to the top selling manufactured houses, I was lucky enough to get the job I have now. In the city in which we used to live. My wife's hometown. Funny how things work. So I just got a new job, my wife's pregnant, things are looking up! Where do we move now? Back in with my wife's parents, of course! Move number six. So here we have been, living with the in-laws, celebrating the holidays year after year, sticking together through thick and thin, and watching my little girl grow up to be a beautiful young woman.
Ok, it hasn't been that long, but it sure feels like it. Seriously, though, almost a full year later, we are finally getting ready to move into our own house! By ourselves! We're growing up. And I'm hoping this will be the last move we make for a while--at least for the next eight months or so, anyways.

What Did I Do To Deserve This?

The most amazing thing happened to me three and a half years ago. Something spectacular. It was three years in the making, and a couple of times, almost didn't happen at all. Everyone told me how lucky I was, but somehow it never really sank in at the time. Sometimes I wonder if it ever will. But this amazing, remarkable, spectacular, incredible thing that happened to me...was marriage.
Now that I've captured all the women's attention and lost any guy that may have been reading, I will continue.
The act of marriage was great. The ceremony was short and sweet, the reception was a blast. But that's not the best part about this marriage. Oh, no. And for those of you who think I'm about to go into detail about the wedding night, get your minds out of the gutter. You're perverts. The part I want to talk about, the part that I never deserved and still don't, is my incredible wife, who I don't talk about nearly enough.
This person who walked into my life over six years ago has still got me falling all over myself every day. And there is one quality that I want to focus on in this blog, and maybe more later--and that is patience. My wife is the most patient person I have ever known. And the fact that I'm the most impatient person I know says enough about her right there. She makes Ghandi look like an anxiety attack. Let me give an example. The other day, my 10-month-old daughter was screaming at the top of her lungs. I, being the impatient non-deservant person I am, just raised my voice and said "Stop screaming!" And though she continued to scream, my wife just shot me one of her magnificent smiles and giggled a little. I don't understand why the screaming doesn't affect her. Things like that just don't get to her, it's weird. I wish I could have thought of a better example, because that doesn't even begin to explain the patience and understanding this woman holds.
My wife is the most amazing woman I have ever met and I can honestly say that she's too good for me. I really hope she never figures that out.

I just found a picture of me to put in my profile! This is me in my senior picture. I know, I know...I didn't get a chance to fluff dry my hair after gym class.

Love and Marriage

I guess I took things too far last night. If you read my blog yesterday, you know my situation. The minute my wife got here to pick me up (my car's in the shop) I blew up at her. She didn't get here until 5:08! I was in the freaking freezing cold for EIGHT MINUTES! But, as my wife was quick to show me, I was definitely in the wrong. So she was mad at me because I was mad at her as soon as I got in the car. Anyway, we were on our way to the church for my wife to do the bulletin board. We got there and she decided it was a little too crowded to do her bulletin board. So we left. We were on our way back into town and were going to stop at Fazoli's for my coworker's fundraiser, but because we were so mad at each other, I figured it was best not to sit down to a meal together in angered silence. I told her to just pick Wendy's up and we'll take it home to eat--oh yeah, and I'm not going to church. So we passed Fazoli's, then she said she's not stopping at Wendy's because SHE'S going to church and won't be eating dinner after all. I can eat at home, she says. I said, "No, stop at Wendy's." She says no. She's driving--what am I going to do? So we get within a mile of Wendy's and I start pleading with her. "Please stop at Wendy's, I'm really hungry and there's nothing to eat at home!" "No," she says. "We have hotdogs--you'll eat a hot dog." So I give in. There's not much I can do in the passenger seat. We got home finally and I made a hot dog--not nearly as good as the Spicy Chicken Combo I was hoping for. My wife shortly left for church. This gave me a great chance to play my new PS2 game, Mercenaries. I can never play when she's around. She hates my PS2. She's tried to break it a few times. I played for a little bit, then heard the door slam about 15 minutes later. After beating two levels of my game, I quickly shut it off--without saving--NOOOOOOOOOOO! I just didn't want her to know what I was doing (even though she did). So I went out in the living room and she yelled at me some more. I won't go into detail, but there was some crying and shaking involved, and numerous insults thrown my way. I tried to be nice because I was sick of arguing, and repeatedly apologized for my mistakes and wanting to eat at Wendy's--boy, what a jerk I was. She eventually forgave me and we watched television in peace.
And none of this would have happened if she had just shown up on time.

Hump Day

Well, today is going to suck. And not so much just my work day, but a lot of it has to do with after work, too. There's nothing I love more than getting off of work at 5:00, going home, having some dinner, then vegging on the couch while I play a little PS2. But not tonight, oh no. Tonight I can't even go home until around 8:30! Right after work, my wife is picking me up (because my car's a piece of junk and won't start) and taking me to church. Now Wednesday night church doesn't start until 7:00, but we're going to be there around 5:30. She was asked to work on a bulletin board for the church commons. I guess tonight seems to her like a good night to start it. Do I have to be there? NO, but if I don't go, my wife will be mad at me all night. I can't win either way. She'll probably still be mad at me because I'll be complaining about it the whole time. So after that's done, we'll finally go eat dinner. We HAVE to go to Fazoli's because my stupid coworker has some stupid fundraiser for a missions trip. I have to get all you can eat spaghetti because that's the only thing that helps the fundraiser, even though I can't eat any more than 1 plate of it! Stupid Parker. I guess I can look forward to my taped recording of American Idol when I get home. And CSI: New York at 10:00. Wow, I really have no life. Well, I'm having a lot of fun with this blog. Even though I'm sure if anyone reads this they'll just forget about it within around 20 seconds of finishing. I really need to make myself more memorable. I LOVE SNIFFING ARGYLE SOCKS!

Chicago Revisited

What makes a great Valentine's Day? Jewelry? Presents? Flowers? Chocolates? Thoughtfulness? Personally, I think it's a combination of all of these (not, however, on the same year). But most of all (because I don't have any money to buy things), I think thoughtfulness makes a good Valentine's Day spectacular. I wasn't sure how thoughtful I was on V Day, but I knew my wife would like it. I surprised her with Chicago on Valentine's Day Eve--Sunday. We hadn't been there since our college graduation in 2002, and we had a blast. We stayed in a corner suite in the Omni Hotel, right on Michigan Avenue. Probably the nicest hotel room I've ever been in. Because we have no money and brought along our 10-month-old daughter, Abby, there wasn't a whole lot we were able to do. Walking around Chicago is enough, though. Just to take in the architecture does a lot for a midwesterner. We left Monday and headed for our Alma Mater, Olivet Nazarene University. That caused the memories to come flooding back. My wife's and my first date with each other...basically where we did all of our dating. Not a whole lot had changed, which made it feel as though we had never left. College was an amazing time. My daughter just added to the experience. I was looking all over at Olivet, trying to find someone I knew to show off my daughter to. Unfortunately, I guess I've been gone too long (is 3 years too long?) to find anyone there I still knew. We still had a lot of fun, visited some of the hot spots we frequented in college, and felt satisfied with our visit there.
I hope my wife truly felt romanced on this Valentine's Day.

New To This...

In Hamlet, Shakespeare wrote, "Give thy thoughts no tongue." The next best thing then, I guess, would be words. So I thought I'd give it a try. One reason I haven't started a blog until now was that I couldn't see the purpose. Does anyone even read it? Who? The other self-centered, narrow-minded people writing their own blogs? (The category in which I am now included.) Who cares what thousands of other people have to say? But I guess, if nothing else, it can be used for therapeutic purposes; writing to relieve my mind and get things off my chest. My job, for example, is filled with stress. Being an admissions representative is a pressure-filled, unbearable, overwhelming, unbelievably exhausting job. (Not really.)
But, apart from my job, I know there's got to be something stressful in my life that I can write about. I mean, my eye's not constantly twitching uncontrollably for no reason at all. It's becoming socially embarrassing.
This could work for a while; in the meantime, I think I'll keep venting to no one.